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This article is a transcript of the Greatest Freakout Ever episode "Greatest freakout ever 18" from season, which posted on November 17, 2011.


  • Jack: All right, my mom just got this new kitten. And uh, it just so happens to be that Stephen's terrified of cats so, let's see what he thinks about this little furball. Stephen! (Whispering Voice): He's terrified of cats.
  • Stephen: What?
  • Jack: Look at this cat.
  • Stephen: Yeah, you can keep that away from me.
  • Jack: Look, it just a baby kitten, look how cute...
  • Stephen: I don't care if it's a baby.
  • Jack: Well, it wants you, Stephen.
  • Stephen: I don't care. Get it away from me!
  • Jack: Why are you running through this? Walk on the...
  • Stephen: Because it's disgusting, it's a little ball of sickness. Get it away from me!
  • Jack: Come here, Stephen.
  • Stephen: Get it away from me!
  • Jack: Why are you running from it...
  • Stephen: Get it away!
  • Jack: It's just a kitten.
  • Stephen: Yeah, a disgusting little nasty one. They're all nasty and they're disgusting.
  • Jack: You think this is nasty?
  • Stephen: Carry diseases..
  • Jack: You think, it doesn't have any diseases, Stephen.
  • Stephen: Yeah, bullcrap it doesn't have diseases.
  • Jack: Come here.
  • Stephen: You're telling me that thing does not have diseases. Keep it away. Keep your distance. Now I don't know why you like those nasty things but I, don't, obviously. But, get it away!
  • Jack: Why are you backing up?
  • Stephen: Get it away!
  • Jack: You don't like this kitten? (Kitten is looking at Jack's camera with its face and its eye)
  • Stephen: No, I don't.
  • Jack: Why not?
  • Stephen: Because I don't think they're cute, I think they're, freakin', weird, they're nasty.
  • Jack: They're not weird or nasty...
  • Stephen: Yeah, they're, they're... (Shuts the ranger door)
  • Jack: Where are you going? (Stephen starts the ranger) Stephen. Stephen.
  • Stephen: What?
  • Jack: What are you doing? No. You can't go forward, Stephen, you have to go backwards. Man. That's scary, you're 18 years old. Stephen, where are you going? It's just a kitten, come here. (Stephen drives away and Jack laughs while holding the baby kitten and his camera) He's that afraid of kittens.

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